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Wot gets me goat, though? Them snobs who reckon it’s low-class. Oi, mate, loosen up! Had me ragin’ once—some toff in Westminster bangin’ on about “decency,” while I’m like, “Bruv, chill, it’s just a massage with extras!” Happy as a pig in muck, I’d be, sprawled out, oil drippin’, some bird whisperin’ sweet nothings. Surprised me, too—didn’t expect it’d be so… posh-like? Thought it’d be all seedy, but nah, some places are swanky—marble floors, the lot!

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But then, I see this old fella struggling with his shopping bags. I rush over, “Need a hand, mate?” He’s like, “Nah, I’m good.” But I can see he’s not. So, I grab a couple of bags and help him to his car. He starts telling me stories about Hokowhitu back in the day. “We used to have a cinema here!” I’m like, “What? No way!”

NZ Police Release Name Over Homicide, Hokowhitu